00:00:02.000 Hi, everyone. Welcome. My name is Gerard, and this is my ministry partner, Allison, and welcome to our milmac musings podcast. And we also have a ministry, which is Destined for Glory. So today what we'd like to do is just kind of give you an overview of the why we are starting to have this podcast. And we just want to start out by mentioning that. This is a place where we will intersect the Bible with science.

00:00:30.000 And so we're going to be talking about how important it is to understand that they intersect, not one or the other. They intersect and just that's just the way God made us. It's just amazing how creative he is. Alison and I were talking earlier prior to the podcast, how each of us, how over 8 billion people, how unique we are, each of us have our own fingerprints, our redness that are just so individual voices.

00:01:00.000 So we just want to help you understand that the Bible is really an amazing, amazing book that has been Holy Spirit inspired. But God also made our brains and our minds. And that is equally creative and what he has done. So as we move forward, we want to talk about issues such as adverse childhood experiences, trauma, and we're going to be laying the foundation for more of a trauma based vocabulary.

00:01:37.000 And be understanding that as families and interpersonal relationships, you'll have the wherewithal to understand how as we have unprocessed emotions, it will our goal is to bring them to be processed. So we want to bring them out. So once we can understand the emotions and God has given us emotions, a whole array of them, and as we understand that he gave us the emotions, and you can see it in the Bible, he has them as well.

00:02:10.000 There are reasons for it. But when we can put a name to an emotion, we can understand that we are actually in there. So that's our goal is to lay the foundation to understand how we can get to that point. Now, that's just a simplistic way of trying to give an overview of what we'll be doing for future podcasts as well. But again, it's the foundation that's key. So do you have anything to offer at the moment? Well, I just wanted to back up a little bit and tell them how we met.

00:02:37.000 We met at church for entrepreneurs back in 2019. And we were both working to figure out how to bring our ministries. Forward to help other people. And you want to finish your story there? So it was in 2019 that I was listening to a Bible project podcast and it was doctor Haley. I think it's doctor Jacob Haley. And she was talking about a book.

00:03:06.000 And it was really about testing for glory how we're all, that's how we get. We're destined for glory. And so it's one of those things where we have it, but not yet. So that's just something for a later topic. But anyway, I was listening to it, and it was a great teaching on it. And then we, as Allison mentioned, we met at the church of entrepreneurs. And again, we both were looking for the direction of the ministries that we wanted to do. God has put something on a heart.

00:03:38.000 But one of the things that from my perspective, I got ahead of God. So we met in Allison had a wonderful book that she was able to she was kind enough to give me a copy of, and it really helped me because she put everything out there and she was very vulnerable. And that's the way we all need to be. We really do. So after reading the book, I was so impressed by it.

00:04:04.000 I wanted to write my own story, not as in depth as Alison, but just to get everything else that was buried inside of me for a year. Now, it's been just a number. You probably 12 years ago, I came to just really believe in Jesus. And from that point on, it's just been a wonderful experience in a way that even though we go through difficult times, we can understand he's right there with us. And this is in line with our podcast.

00:04:36.000 So we're going to go back to the why we're having these issues from childhood forward. So when we have our issues as a childhood, in childhood, rather, for the adverse childhood experiences, we've built up a defense strategy at that time that stays with us. So we bring that into adulthood and relationships. We're still looking back at how that 12 or ten or 15 year old person is dealing with the strategy that the defense strategy has never been changed.

00:05:05.000 So again, we'll get back to the M process day process emotions. And it's really a wonderful thing to begin to understand. So Allison and I always say is to peel back the layers. So if you see somebody acting or hear or whatever the case may be, somebody acting, less than their age. Or you know in somewhat of a bad behavior, it's most likely not that they're bad. It's what's caused the behavior and it stems from childhood.

00:05:35.000 And again, we're not going back to blame anybody. We're just going back for knowledge and understanding. This is what happened at a given time. And from that point on, we have to try to process the emotions, as I say. And that's something that's going to be key. And we're going to teach you how to do that. There's many, many great teachings of how to do it, what it is, how to change, and to live for the better. That's the key. When we have interpersonal relationships. And so I'm just speaking for each individual.

00:06:03.000 So when you multiply that when each individual comes together in an adult relationship, then that's magnified because each of us have our own adverse childhood experiences and trauma that we suffered. And some people have suffered through horrific you know trauma for sexual abuse, physical abuse. And there's other things, too, that to create such a shame like a attachment, pain, attunement is very important.

00:06:27.000 So when a child is born, the first thing they see is a parent, or a good nurturing parent, when they have the ability to look into the child's eyes, the child sees safety, and that's the key for them to understand. And we talked a bit ago about the brain, and it's really amazing. So from the age of zero to three, the brain is 90% developed. So it's so important to have that attunement and attachment to have a good, healthy, strong way to move forward in life.

00:06:59.000 And that comes with parents who are within themselves are grounded and understand this, but not everybody has it. And so many people don't. So we're here to tell you that it's okay to understand the behaviors and why we did that. And it's not blaming anybody. As I mentioned, it's not condemning. It's just like praise God. We have again the Bible and the science that intersects. So we'll be able to explain so much more about it.

00:07:29.000 Activity thoughts on that? Well, I was just thinking as you were talking about that, how so many of us are raised to not talk about the things that happen to us. And it is so critical, I believe, for us to be able to get that outside of us. And to be able to share that with somebody safe and to really express what happened before we can even begin to connect the dots and understand what happened.

00:07:57.000 So I think that this is going to be very powerful for many people in their lives to, first of all, understand their story, why they've been where they've been, what they did. And then to understand where they are now, how they're wired, and why they do the things they do and how to always call it managing my emotions. If I don't manage my emotions, my emotions will manage me. And so really understanding that part of it.

00:08:27.000 And gaining a greater relationship with yourself. I guess you know, I'm not saying self. I'm saying you know my whole, my whole foundation came through, understanding the love of Christ for me. And so understanding the love of Christ for you, how you are created in him, how you are wired in him. And then being able to have relationships with other people in a healthier way than what we learned when we were growing up.

00:09:00.000 Right. That's a great point. And just to add to that too, Alison mentioned about silence. Many families keep everything within the four walls. And when they do, people really suffer in silence, and then what happens is as a child, you hide your heart, your true feelings, and because of that, you're trying to keep the attachment with your parents because you feel at that point, they can do no wrong.

00:09:28.000 And so it's really difficult when you hide your heart as a child, and you build up that defense strategy when you bring it into the adult relationship. That's what we're going to help you understand why that happened or what we can do to understand that. And we're looking at the little child, and it's not going back to like a dual personality.

00:09:51.000 It's just you have a child who had a defense mechanism at that age, and you're going to be able to reconcile that and bring it forward and just Allison said to with your emotions to manage your emotions. And it may sound difficult, but it's not when you start to learn how to do it. And you start to really understand it. There's been so many other and I'm not blaming anybody in this aspect, but to so many other marriage counseling and marriage retreats and marriage seminars that really don't teach this.

00:10:26.000 They're teaching you to do it yourself to understand it, but there's so much beneath the surface that we feel, we need to bring to the open for the information to be put out there. So this is really something God has put on our hearts. And we're just so blessed to be able to be a part of this. And what we want to do is in the future, we want to bring guests on who have you know the ability to be forefront in their field, whether it is the biblical aspect of things or the counseling, pastoral counseling or theology aspect of it, but also to have the understanding from a neuroscience aspect too.

00:11:07.000 Yes, I'm so thankful that we are being a part of that part of it because I guess it was probably about ten years ago when I was first introduced. I was at a conference for Christian leaders and there was a Christian scientist that came and spoke. And what she shared was so foreign to me, I'd never heard anything like what she was talking about, but I knew because of my relationship.

00:11:38.000 With the lord, I knew that what she was saying was scriptural. And so it was truth. And I really began to implement those things that she was talking about. I mean, I was just thirsty for what she was talking about and learning about that and how it's helped me so much in my life. And I promise you, as a little girl, I laid down on the floor and kicked and screamed and held my breath until I turned blue. And I don't do that anymore.

00:12:04.000 And but I do recognize you know, we do those in different ways. As adults, clearly, but we learn. How to recognize when those are coming, and then how to heal from those through the neuroplasticity and the way that our brains are developed and the way that God created our brains to actually renew. Yeah, absolutely. So you want to take it from there? Sure.

00:12:33.000 That's what neuroplasticity, as you know, is all about. And so learning that. So getting back, I may have mentioned that I apologize if I have, but when we get together for that time period of reading Alan's book and learning my story, we get ahead of well, I get a head of God. And so moving forward from that time to this point, we were able to learn so much more. So again, the lord brought everything together and again, it's the key to all that is just seeking.

00:13:02.000 So it's asked seek a knot. So that being said, all of that we've learned since that time of meeting, we have we are able to actually make that a part of the foundation of what we're going to do for our podcast. And I am so, so excited to be able to share with you what I've learned. And I've been able to use this in my life as well. And that's the wonderful thing because what was going through life prior to really knowing the lord, I had so much shame.

00:13:35.000 I had a mask. I hid behind a mask. And I'm not afraid to say that because first of all, I have learned to be vulnerable and that's the key to getting off from underneath this mask. But the other thing is, too, you also know that so many other people are doing the same thing. And they were unhappy. That's what we wanted to do. And I was a great way to free you from that prison. And I was in that prison. So I'm talking to the crowd.

00:14:02.000 And so I wanted to throw that in there in case I didn't elaborate enough on that because that's a very important part of where we are at this moment and where the ministry is going as well. And to understand the neuroplasticity as Allison had mentioned, is something that's really important. Our minds are amazing and as I mentioned from zero three, it's 90% formed.

00:14:27.000 So when we are understanding that, at this point in our lives, when we are in a situation adult lives, we can and it's great news. We can be new our mind all the time. And it's the neurons within the neuroplasticity. And it's something that they create new pathways. And so it's like reading scripture when you renew your mind understanding who we are in Christ and the mirror image of what he says and who he says we are.

00:14:57.000 That's the same thing with the brain, how it works, and with the neuroplasticity, when you start to have thoughts that you keep magnifying over and over again, the good, the good thoughts as well as the ones that give you the understanding of really just the emotions that you go through. And to understand how, by doing it the way that really the word is guided us to from both the biblical and the neuroscience aspect, we're able to come to the other side.

00:15:30.000 And when we come to the other side, just think of the sphere of influence you have. So if you're one person that's among a family, and you do that, then the other people around you are changed as well, because they'll see the change. And you're able to look at them in a different light as well. So from my perspective, I just I can't wait to share all that we have. And it's going to be quite a bit because and it's not to say we know it all, but it is to say that we certainly understand how to get the information we've learned it.

00:15:59.000 We've lived it, and we're able to bring this to you in a way that we are just so excited to be able to help you understand that the good news is out there. Not only the good news of the gospel, but the good news that through neuroscience that we can change our thought patterns. And that's the key to everything. I'm just going to go back real quick to what you were saying about the mask. Because that is the key. If you think about you know you have a mask on and to everyone else on the outside, you look great.

00:16:33.000 But on the inside, you're tormented with different types of thought processes, different whatever they are that are from your past, okay? And you can't control those thought processes, or you think you can't. Control them. And so you operate in this either shame or guilt or condemnation or whatever it is that is really your thing that you're dealing with.

00:17:00.000 When you take that mask off, and I mean, I wore the mask, and I can speak from a woman's perspective, women are very good at masking how they feel, what they look like by making sure that they have pretty close and makeup and beautiful hair. And that was me. And so when I took my mask off, I literally went through a season of life where I just went completely natural with everything.

00:17:30.000 And it was so freeing to me. And it's like just removing that mask. And walking in who you really are and walking and transparency, I think. And there's something that it does inside of you. It gives you a certain type of piece. You can be who you are. And how you were created. And that is so valuable in your life.

00:17:58.000 And so I just wanted to say that because it is a freedom from a prison. Yeah, it's a great way to put it. You know, just following up with what Allison has mentioned too. As a man, we have a different role from a perspective of western society. We're not really meant to really process our emotions to really bring them out into the open. Women to be you know the stern, the manly type, who the person who solves problems, but doesn't really need help from other people because we may ask.

00:18:32.000 And it's just a bunch of baloney to put it. That way. And that's not the way we're supposed to be. And that's not the way that wasn't the way Jesus was. Jesus was absolutely a man through and through, but he was loving, compassionate, and he would get angry as well. But the thing is that as men, we have to be vulnerable. And it can be very difficult. That is probably as a from a man's perspective. I think anybody's perspective, the most scary thing to do initially.

00:19:02.000 But as Alison was saying, when you start doing these things, like when she was mentioning she went natural with everything. And you know when I brought things out into the open, you have that free experience that nobody can take that away from you. And that's what we want everybody to have. And to understand that we're all made in God's image and to know that we are loved by such a beautiful lord. It's just amazing. And that helps heal us. So we're going to explain everything that we're talking about neuroscience wise, from a biblical aspect.

00:19:31.000 But I think both of us really realize it's the love of Christ that really, really, really helps us. And I know we have a lot of mainstream denominations out there that show it a little differently. So they have more of their denominational ways of looking at God. And some of them aren't as I can say. I was going to say truthful, but that's not a bad that's not a good word. I would just say not as honest. With his true identity.

00:20:01.000 And that's what we really when you bring the two of them together and you get free and to understand the abilities for ability for each of us to live in his image and to live for him and for his purpose and his purpose isn't anything that's overwhelming. It's just to be a part of how he has his planned kingdom. So when we bring all of this together, it's just, for me, it's an amazing journey. And I'm continuing it day after day.

00:20:31.000 And I get up in the morning and I know I'm excited. And we want each of you to be as well. I just want to add one more thing for this acronym called slap. And the reason it's that way, the wording for that is shame, lack of attachment pain, and when we all go through that, until we're free, we go through that. We stay caught up in our own shame and other people can do that to us as well, but we have to be me. So we have to be the best me that we can be.

00:21:02.000 And that's the way God made us. Totally agree. Totally agree. And he wants us to be the best version of ourselves that we can be because that's who he created us to be. And so it's just really exciting to be able to share all of this with you. And Gerard and I feel very blessed and you know we are every day in our own journey and I would just like to say from a personal aspect, my relationship is with Jesus Christ, not I don't put myself in a box and say that I'm with a certain denomination and I think Gerard is the same.

00:21:42.000 It's all about our relationship with Christ and I feel it's important to say that because I don't want anybody to feel like that there's no opportunity for them to listen to what we have to say because they're in a certain place or they have to be. I mean, that is not a Jesus is. Jesus says, come and follow me. And so yeah, I just wanted to add that because I think it's important.

00:22:09.000 And I think that many of us probably have been. Throughout our lives throughout our childhood throughout our adult lives, even we were on a path, okay? And we're all searching and seeking to really know the truth. The truth is, is that Jesus is truth? And so that's what I've learned about. That's who I've learned about. That's how I've learned about love, and the only reason that I'm sitting here with Gerard today.

00:22:41.000 Yeah. And as we talked about the foundation of the things we're going to teach you, which is going to put everything we're seeing into place. It's a work in progress, meaning that it takes time. But once you get the knowledge and understanding, that's truly what's really going to be the amazing result of following the podcast and asking questions and I think she may have mentioned it to but we will have resources that will be a part of this and we certainly to back up exactly what we're seeing and to give you a great overview of how best to move forward and what we're seeing and to have the tools that are needed to move forward to be the best me that you can be.

00:23:22.000 And again, that's just about the way God is designed as to do. And as we move forward with that aspect, I just want to say just one other thing as well. As we understand that we're being following Christ and the biblical science comes together, we have to understand that what we've gone through excuse me, there's no condemnation for anybody. It's just about learning exactly who we are in Christ.

00:23:51.000 And what he's done for us. I look at everything we've been through as an experience. And it's not that I did wrong things. It's what I knew to do at the time. And what do you need to do at the time with the information that you had? And as Gerard has said and many others, knowledge is power. And so as we learn more about that, without condemnation. And how to work through those, which is very much where we come from.

00:24:22.000 No condemnation. It's an experience. If you messed up, it's a mistake. We're learning from it. And we take that lesson forward and we use it in our lives and others. I couldn't say anything, but also thank you. It was great. So at this point, do you have anything else you'd like to add?

00:24:44.000 No, just thank you all for being with us and share with anyone that you feel like would benefit from this that you feel like would grow from this or if there are any, I guess, leadership, church leadership, where you feel like maybe they need to learn more about this. Please share our podcast with them. That's thank you for mentioning that. And that's another thing too, just before we sign off, is that you know we're known denomination?

00:25:12.000 And that doesn't mean that if you're from a denomination, you certainly can listen to us, but the good thing is we don't filter anything through a denominational aspect. We just filter it from how best that Jesus is working through us. And that's the key to do that together and we're looking forward to walking this journey with you. And we just would love for you to once we start putting out the information and the resources for you to be looking at them and to really, really come to understand who you are.

00:25:42.000 And that's just, to me, that's the most exciting thing for each person for each individual who's a part of this, just to become the best that you can be. So thank you for joining. Do you have any other words? I was just thinking if anybody had any questions or something that they would like to learn more about or like us to talk about, that we would love to hear from you. You can email us at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

00:26:12.000 Well, thank you. That's great. Thank you very much. So as we sign off here, I would like to say thank you and just we're looking forward for you to be part of our future podcast. And again, any questions you have, please feel free to email. You okay. I'm good. All right. Thank you. Well, thank you again for joining and we look forward to you for you to be a part of all this. And have a great day. Thank you.